Mocktails & Glam
A New Project
Stepping away from my blog and re-branding let me enjoy the pause; the break away from creating and consuming content day after day. I wanted to feel electrified in my passion for writing and art and less of the weight of worrying about Instagram followers or churning out blog posts I wasn’t 100 percent feeling. I needed that pause. I see my blog and social media platforms like Instagram as creative outlets, not a measure of success. I’ve been grateful to work and have worked with some amazing artisans and companies and will continue too, but the root of my blog is always that of pure love for creativity.
I’m excited about my second project immensely. Excited and Proud. Mocktails + Glam is a blog & social media platform supporting a sober lifestyle though fashion, art & words! Enjoy recipes for delicious mocktails, inspiration, fun ideas and chic style!
I had debilitating panic attacks as a teenager and at age 19 I was putting on Ativan, an anti-anxiety medicine. For a long time it worked perfectly and had no issues but as I got older, my dosage increased and I would run out quicker. I was going in frenzied circles and cycles - going through my prescription, running out, increased anxiety, insomnia, getting my prescription, and it continued and spiraled. I didn’t have any coping skills, there was no tools I had to deal with my panic attacks - I relied solely on doctor prescribed medication. The past year and half i could see I had grown a dependency and so could anyone extremely close to me. I tried my best to hide it, i didn’t want to admit it was a problem because I did need it, after all. My anxiety is very real and it helped me. If I had a real problem I’d be arrested or living under a bridge or hanging out in shady places or using illegal drugs, I thought. I wasn’t doing any of those, so i’m fine. I just have bad anxiety and this is medication my doctor gives me, it can’t be a problem, I’d tell myself. It was though. I was creating my own chaos for years with it. I wanted nothing more but stability and peace but you can’t have those two things when you are caught up in the wind and electricity and debris of the tornado you’re in. When I finally had enough I sought help and am so thankful for my counselor, my wonderful new doctor and all my friends and family who supported me and knew about this long before I started Mocktails & Glam. Anti-anxiety medicine, known as “benzos” is a tricky thing to get off of but with time and tapering off with sound medical advice, I feel like a whole new person. I wasn’t able to live my best life, an authentic life or a peaceful life.
I feel clarity. I feel healthier - mind, body and spirit. I sleep better, I’m gentler to myself. My creativity is back and my focus on my blogs has been laser sharp. I’m excited it’s turned into financial profit as well as collaborating with some amazing people and companies (coming soon!). My anxiety is under control, there’s been such a huge decrease that whenever I realize it doesn’t have me in its grips anymore, I smile. I’m learning more and more tools: yoga, writing, reading, running, meditating.
Tapering off my Ativan, I also knew i had to completely cut out alcohol. I felt I didn’t have a healthy relationship with alcohol and the fact that even in social situations, the main reason I’d drink was to soothe my anxiety. Once again because I didn’t drink every day and hated hard alcohol, I thought it wasn’t problematic but deep down I always knew it was a negative in my life. It only caused bad hangovers, increased anxiety and depression and more chaos. I never felt so committed and strong willed about stopping. i just don’t want or need it and will not go back.
Not all days are easy, but that is life and sobriety has been the best gift I’ve ever given myself. I was at first shy and ashamed to admit that - but i am not. I feel my best, my strongest, my most authentic. There doesn’t have to be this stigma. And that’s why I share my story - if it connects to just one person then I did what I hoped to do - inspire and motivate.
Now back to Mocktails & Glam
I wanted to curate a place where people can enjoy fashion and art but also feel inspired and supported in their sober lifestyle. This is geared for those who don’t drink and those in any stage of recovery - but we welcome all those that are kind! You don’t need champagne to be chic or a Mimosa to be glam. The idea behind this platform is that glamour might be considered fancy - but take away the makeup and glitz - glamour is first and foremost a glow. Here it’s a sober glow! I want to keep it lighthearted also, a fun place to go to for community, for fashion, for creative ideas and the inspiration to continue to grow in healthy ways.
Check out my new project I’m over the moon about - Mocktails + Glam
I’m grateful to be here and i’ll keep on coming,